Till When Can We Gather Again?

Danny's leaving too...I'm a useless sister who could never communicate well with my brother. Yea true, the youngest daughter doesn't know what's happening in the family at all. Even during the crisis I'm the last one to realise it. Am i being too protective by my family or am i just too dumb to believe the fact that the sun will always shine? Nah, bad things will eventually happen to anyone anytime. Only 3 left in Malaysia now. 2.5 to be exact, I'm only considered half. Liew family is broken, I'm officially homeless. I miss those days when i go back home everybody gather in the house and make so much noise, i miss my mum's laughter. The house now is empty and cold, making me shiver every time i go back. The couch remains untouched, with some dust on it, and some cigarette ash on the floor. I think the fishes are crying too. The cross hanging on the wall doesn't seem to give much love to the house either.

Talked with mum in skype the other day. (Yea, nowadays i depend on this technology, which i think it's dumb sometimes to talk over the screen. Pathetic.) Mixture of feelings i saw from her face, the excitement to get to see her son again and the worries...Too, i realise she doesn't laugh like last time she used to anymore. I used to fantasize a lot bout snow when i was small, but now that i know it's not as good as i thought it would be. Ha, when people grow older they start to reveal more ugly side of the world and then forced to accept it and continue breathing...ain't it?

A reunion dinner without family members, a chinese new year with the freaking freezing weather in a foreign land plus some snow, how is it feels like.

And me, i don't wanna think bout myself.